a thank you to the brave ones

(gay prom photo by Kim Komenich SF Chronicle) 

Did anyone else wake up this morning feeling like I they got punched in the stomach? Proposition 8 stands- stripping away my fundamental right to marry whom I choose. I know everyone is saying not to worry, that it's only a matter of time, that they've won the battle, not the war. I guess in the back of my mind I believe that, but aren't we allowed some time to be outraged and speak up about it? And I'm curious: what is actually going to happen in that "matter of time?" What force of nature is so inevitable? What is going to radically re-educate those full of fear that our love, our hands holding, our kiss is just as natural in the world? While we're rallying and producing more commercials and mounting our offensive, they'll still be teaching their children lies about us. 6th graders will still hear someone call their friend a "faggot" in a school that won't allow an after-school gay student group. Most gay teens will still be going to prom wishing they were dancing with someone else. And this weekend millions will take their kids to churches where they'll be taught that marriage was almost saved completely from the immoral gay agenda. More and more, I'm realizing that the freedom to accept and express yourself doesn't begin at the ballot box. It starts when a straight 6th grader stands up for his gay friend in the lunch-line. The ball rolls forward for everyone when Jennifer takes Amy to the prom. A congregation will be forced into dialogue when an entire youth group walks out during an anti-gay sermon. There are brave young ones out there. There are brave teachers and administrators and parents and people of faith who create safe communities with zero tolerance for violence of the tongue or the fist. It is in these unseen moments in the classroom, at the staff meeting, in the sanctuary and at the dinner table that some of the broadest strides are made. So when the same volunteers outside my coffee-shop ask if I "have a minute for equal rights" I'm going to ask them if their organization has a campaign in place to provide legal and community support for these braves ones who are doing the real work of educating through visibility and courage. What am I doing to support them? Until I'm confident of my answer, I'll not spend another dollar or moment of my time supporting a campaign of TV commercials and letters to my representatives. So I'll step down from my soapbox with a final and heartfelt "Thank You" to every brave one out there. If you chooses to take the risk of speaking up and being visible in places unsafe, you are the ones undoing the loud lies being muttered, written and preached about us. It is you I am truly grateful for and encouraged by. My shortlist of heroes: Gay Married Couple: Jeff Crerie and Mykel Gubin (http://www.utmosis.net/herecomethegrooms/us.htm) Parent: Robin Scovill (www.robinscovill.com) Educator: Dara Gordon of the Harvey Milk High School, NY (www.hmi.org) Oranization: The ACLU (www.aclu.org) Person of Faith: Mel White (www.soulforce.org) Warmly, Matt